Caldor

He bought brown rainbow Caldor sheets
to brighten shag carpet, beige and moldy.
ET nightgowns, Cabbage Patch,
Prince aluminium tennis racquet.
Braces.

But what I remember is:
waiting for him to pull up late in his 280-ZX,
always afraid he wasn't coming;
Snoopy suitcase, zipper gaping open;
TV blaring Orioles while I missed my mother.

Twenty-seven years pass.
I'm the age he was in my memories.
We've worked hard for fatherdaughter.
We're caustic, sarcastic, anything but real.
Pretending I didn't need what he couldn't give.

The sting of being eight, locked outside, waiting for him to make time,
like sun in my eyes.

Haiku 4 K.X.

I'll call him K.X.
"I don't care," echo, refrain.
Recall: still a child.

Passing

Her mother passed at Christmastime:
A graceful exit, perfect timing, at everyone else’s convenience.
My own Christmastime passings lack grace and good timing.
All but convenient.

Come, Spring.

The Top 40 Songs of 1983

thanks for your note
no nice of you to offer to come out to see us, you two
no but
this is around the time
we might have something else planned: his trip to Vegas
mom’s coming to help with the girls
we won’t know for sure for a few weeks
he’s waiting on some friends.

(so it’ll be too late for cheap fares)
but I'll let you know.

no I want my girls to know you.

just a joke about when we were 11 & 13 on New Year’s Eve and listened from the basement to dad falling down drunk before he drove us around singing along to Casey Kasem counting down the top 40 songs of 1983.