I’ll Carry With Me

Ever-lovin’ paw print
Ribbon rings around yr waist
Tiny plastic alien
Yellow cat, brown bear
Quilt heart, gold frame
Straw suitcase, and always

That picture of myself.

-----

What Prayer Beads

Long hair and
All my secrets
The wisdom of kids
Those same tendencies
Towards home.

-----

January

These are work poems
They collide
Night after night
That’s all it is
To be born again.

and from the end of the bench

i heard someone else's name called
i waited still
then stood to leave

We Are All Here to Help Each Other Be Who We Need to Be

No space backstage,
paid in pasta and red wine
stomping for gigglers
throwing tomatoes for performance art
This is a show we're putting on
Behind the pink door
for you, for your mom
for the faceless black of the darkened room
while we sparkle on a tiny stage
picked out in shining lights
we are more than ourselves then
we are absorbing light,
absorbing laughter
giving it back multiplied a hundredfold
We have been training for this
a long time.

But last night I watched my friends break up on stage
he played the cello, which he has never studied
and she wore what made her feel most like a goddess
he strummed,
she wiggled
he tapped
she reached for him
she looked out at us
well not at us but at the audience
whose hearts were mostly not breaking
and when she was done dancing
she gestured at him with her hand
'its time to go'
and he kept playing
and she rolled her shoulder and tossed her head
'its time to go'
and he kept playing
and she walked offstage slowly
leaving room for him to follow
and he kept playing
until she walked out of the room
then he finally stopped
and he left.

sometimes dance is beautiful
sometimes it's grotesque, sometimes funny
and sometimes it just is
and sometimes it goes.

TWENTY-ONE

The desert will grind an anxious mind
to fine grain whispering sand.

one left

one day left
one night left
walls are blank
the floor is swept
bags are packed
nothing to eat
half a gulp of whiskey
a bottle of cough syrup
a can of sardines
i packed my dishes anyway
the bed was empty but
last night you came crawling back
a phone call
remember me? how you doing? we should talk
you think you want me now
cause i have blue eyes and a nice rack
but you don't realize
one day it won't matter anymore
i'll scare you away
and you won't come back

In the midst my first mental break I was seized by
the notion that by getting warm socks I might...

No. It's still there. It's not like I'm carrying
a torch for anyone, but I have this handful
of dry straws, and once in a while I will
light one and let it burn down. And

over and over! All the time! My fingers singed!